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Transcript This is a transcribed copy for the episode "Laptop Code." Feel free to edit or add to this page as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
Previous: "Relation Shipping" Next: "The Ice Man"

NOTE: Old Man McGucket is the only one actually present at all times. All other speakers speak only on the TV, and are part of clips from previous episodes. When another character is talking or appears, assume that the focus has cut from McGucket to the screen, and when McGucket is talking, unless specified otherwise, assume that the focus is back on him.

Open with McGucket waving.
McGucket (Cutting between him and the screen, where a clip of him dancing is seen) Howdy folks. Old Man McGucket here with another one of my fantastic ideas. (Cut to screen, which shows his laptop and circles the number on the right hand corner) You know I seen this number on my computer box (Cut back to McGucket) but I couldn't tell you how it got there. (Cut to clip of him on the screen, rubbing his head) Oh, I don't recall. (Cut back to him and then to a clip of him looking at the countdown on the laptop) Maybe it's a date or an old-timey phone number. But you know what I think? (Cut back to him; whispers:) I bet it's the coordinates for the passage back to (Clips of him, Soos and Dipper, Mabel and Stan Pines looking down a hole) Possum town. (Clip of him going "Woooo!" as he pats sunscreen onto his stomach. Back to McGucket; in regular voice:) It's a real place! Or maybe it's the number of hairs what's left on my beard... Let me count 'em. (Touching each individual hair on his beard as he counts:) One, two, (Clip of him dancing on top of a car) Jimmy, Steve. (Clip of him sitting up in an animal-like position) Heh? (Cut back to McGucket; looks around) Where am I?

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