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Short opens with Mabel laughing.
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Mabel
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Ha ha ha, aha ha ha ha, aha ha ha ha ha. And that's Mabel's Guide to laughing for an uncomfortable amount of time. (Pause) Uh-oh, here comes more! Aha ha ha ha ha! (Dipper hides his head in a book in the background)
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Intro: A techno mixed version of Mabel's voice calling herself plays while a montage featuring Mabel is played.
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Mabel
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Today: Mabel's Guide to Color!
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Cuts to Mabel with a projector.
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Mabel
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Ah, color. It's all around us! (Turns to a picture of Dipper) From the green of a nauseous twin brother, (Turns to a picture of Grunkle Stan) to the weird orange of an old man's nose, (Turns to a picture of a toilet next to Soos) to the beautiful sky blue of toilet water.
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Soos
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(points towards projector) I'm in that one!
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Mabel
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Yes you are, Soos. (To the camera) But it wasn't always this way. (Turns to a black and white picture) According to history, the world was black and white until color was invented (A wizard Mabel drew appears in the picture) by a magic wizard named "Crayondalf the Fabulous!" What's your favorite color, Gravity Falls?
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Cuts to a montage asking the people of Gravity Falls what their favorite color is.
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Pacifica
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Hot pink.
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Grenda
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Beige!
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Dipper
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Wendy. Wait, what was the question again?
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Soos
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Lasers. Ooh! Or liquid metal! Does leopards count as a color?
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Wendy
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Flannel.
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Soos
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Okay, okay. I've narrowed it down to Aurora Borealis, camouflage...
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Candy
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Magic vision poster!
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Gompers
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(Captioned): Burgundy.
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Stan
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None.
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Mabel
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What?
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Stan
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I don't have a favorite color. I don't even like colors.
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Mabel
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Not even rainbows?
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Stan
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Beats me. I've never seen a rainbow.
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Mabel
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WHAT?!?
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Cuts to Mabel with horns, a siren, and a sign written "COLOR EMERGENCY." Then cuts to Mabel with Dipper, Candy, Grenda and Waddles.
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Mabel
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Alright guys, how can we get Grunkle Stan to see a rainbow? I need ideas, people!
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Waddles
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(Walks away)
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Grenda
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Sometimes if I drink expired milk, I see rainbows! I'm gonna try right now! (Takes out a gallon of expired milk and starts to drink it)
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Candy
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(Takes out a paper, starts drawing on it and shows it to the camera) What if we reflect the rainbow from the falls into Stan's window?
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Dipper and Candy
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Yeah! (High fives)
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Grenda
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Yeah! (Falls off the bed and starts to sleep)
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Candy
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It's fine. She does this.
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Static.
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Mabel
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Alright, we're about to unleash the power of the "Roy-G-Biv-A-Tron" into Stan's office!
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Cuts to Dipper and Candy at the end of the waterfall. They reflect the rainbow with a mirror. Cuts back to Stan.
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Stan
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Nothing brightens the dark room like a light from a window! Time to open the window... (Stan opens the window and the rainbow beams right into his eyes) OH NO!! WHY!!! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING!!
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Mabel
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Ta-daah! Surprise!
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Stan
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MY EYES ARE ON FIRE! AAAAAAHH! AAAAAAAHH! AAAAAAHHH! (Stan falls down)
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Mabel
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Maybe we over did it a little bit.
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Stan
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AAAAAAHH! AAAAAAAHH! OH ITS SO HOT IT HURTS! AAAAAAHH!
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Stan's desk starts to burn. Static. Cuts to Stan getting his eyes bandaged by Soos and Dipper in the background while Mabel is in front of the camera.
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Stan
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Get those bandages good and tight! I'm not giving my life savings to some quack doctor.
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Mabel
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That's it for today! Join us next week when we'll be doing "Mabel's Guide to Apologizing to your Great Uncle."
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Stan
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I hate color more than ever!
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Mabel
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He's just saying that. (Whispering) Cut! Cut it!
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Static.
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