m (correct on screen vs off screen) Tag: Visual edit |
mNo edit summary Tag: Visual edit |
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!Dipper |
!Dipper |
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ā | |A secret passageway |
+ | |A secret passageway. |
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!McGucket |
!McGucket |
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ā | |I'll hambone a message if there's trouble. ''(He slaps his arms and legs. Translation: "Coyotes are coming for our sweetbreads.")'' |
+ | |We'll have to be stealthy. I'll hambone a message if there's trouble. ''(He slaps his arms and legs. Translation: "Coyotes are coming for our sweetbreads.")'' |
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!Dipper |
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!Blind Ivan |
!Blind Ivan |
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ā | |What is it |
+ | |What is it you have seen? |
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!All members |
!All members |
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!Lazy Susan |
!Lazy Susan |
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ā | |Uh, well, uh, I was leaving the diner, and I saw these little bearded doodads, and I was, like, " |
+ | |Uh, well, uh, I was leaving the diner, and I saw these little bearded doodads, and I was, like, "Bwaaa?" |
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!Blind Ivan |
!Blind Ivan |
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ā | |There, there. ''(He pulls [[Memory erasing gun|ray gun]] out of the box. The members pull down their hoods.)'' You won't be like " |
+ | |There, there. ''(He pulls [[Memory erasing gun|ray gun]] out of the box. The members pull down their hoods.)'' You won't be like "Bwaaa?" for much longer. |
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!Lazy Susan |
!Lazy Susan |
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ā | |What is that gizmo? It looks like a hair dryer. Are you guys barbers? ''(The Lead Member zaps her with the gun.)'' |
+ | |What is that gizmo? It looks like a hair dryer. Are you guys barbers? ''(The Lead Member zaps her with the gun.) AAAAAH!'' |
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!Blind Ivan |
!Blind Ivan |
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!Lazy Susan |
!Lazy Susan |
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ā | |My mind is |
+ | |My mind is cleared, thanks to the Society of the Blind Eye. |
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!All Society Members |
!All Society Members |
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ā | |It is unseen |
+ | |It is unseen! |
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!Dipper |
!Dipper |
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!Soos |
!Soos |
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ā | |''(They disguise themselves as a diorama.)'' |
+ | |''(They disguise themselves as a diorama.)'' |
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!First Society Member |
!First Society Member |
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ā | |I could've sworn I heard someone. |
+ | |Man, these are really poorly made. I could've sworn I heard someone. |
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!Second Society Member |
!Second Society Member |
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!Soos |
!Soos |
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ā | | |
+ | |Oh, nobody better mess! |
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!Blind Ivan |
!Blind Ivan |
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!Soos |
!Soos |
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ā | |Dysentery' gonna get you, dawg |
+ | |Dysentery' gonna get you, dawg! |
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!Dipper |
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!Blind Ivan |
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ā | |Oh no you don't |
+ | |Oh no you don't! |
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!Dipper |
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!Soos |
!Soos |
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ā | | |
+ | |Well, time to erase that forever. ''(He holds up the gun, but Blind Ivan snatches it.)'' |
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!Blind Ivan |
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!Dipper |
!Dipper |
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ā | |No!! ''(He shields his eyes, but finds McGucket has jumped in front of the group, catching the ray.)'' McGucket, you took a bullet for me. |
+ | |No!! ''(He shields his eyes, but finds McGucket has jumped in front of the group, catching the ray.)'' McGucket, you took a bullet for me. (McGucket gets shot with the ray again.) Oh my gosh! Are you okay! |
ā | |- |
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ā | !Mabel |
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ā | |Oh my gosh! Are you okay? |
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!McGucket |
!McGucket |
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ā | |As okay as I'll ever be |
+ | |As okay as I'll ever be! ''(laughs)'' |
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!Blind Ivan |
!Blind Ivan |
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!McGucket |
!McGucket |
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ā | |Hit me with your best shot, Baldy |
+ | |Hit me with your best shot, Baldy! My mind's been gone for thirty-odd years! YOU CAN'T BREAK WHAT'S ALREADY BROKEN! |
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! |
! |
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+ | McGucket |
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ā | |Say goodnight, Sally |
+ | |Say goodnight, Sally! ''(He headbutts Blind Ivan. The Society members are tied up)'' |
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!Blind Ivan |
!Blind Ivan |
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!Mabel |
!Mabel |
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ā | |Your name is Toot-toot McBumbersnazzle. You're a |
+ | |Your name is Toot-toot McBumbersnazzle. You're a traveling banjo minstrel, with a song in your heart, and funny tattoos on your head. |
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!Blind Ivan |
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!Younger McGucket |
!Younger McGucket |
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ā | |It worked! I can't recall a thing. ''(Static)'' I call it the Society of the Blind Eye. We will help those who want to forget by erasing bad memories |
+ | |It worked! I can't recall a thing. ''(Static)'' I call it the Society of the Blind Eye. We will help those who want to forget by erasing their bad memories! ''(Static, Younger McGucket is more disheveled and nervous.)'' Today, I came across a colony of little men, very disturbing. I would like to forget seeing this. ''(Static. McGucket's lab is a mess and his arm is in a cast.)'' I accidentally hit another car in town today. I feel terri-bibble! Terrible. I've been forgetting words lately. I wonder if there are any negative side effects... ''(static. McGucket has a beard and is filming from a motel.)'' I saw something in the lake, something big! ''(static) ''My hair's been a-fallin' out, so I got this hat from a scarecrow. Hey, are my pants on backwards? ''(static. McGucket is wild-eyed and filming from the junkyard. Maniacal giggling and speaking gibberish. The tape ends.)'' |
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!Mabel |
!Mabel |
Revision as of 19:51, 30 October 2014
This is a transcribed copy for the episode "Society of the Blind Eye." Feel free to edit or add to this page as long as the information comes directly from the episode. |
Previous: "Little Gift Shop of Horrors" | Next: "Blendin's Game" |
Open to a shot of Greasy's Diner. Lazy Susan is locking up the diner for the night. | |
Lazy Susan | (hums while sweeping a broom across the floor) Ta dum, locking up. (peers at possums scurrying around in the dishes) (pokes the possums with her broom) Shoo, possums, shoo! (She walks near a table) Git, McGucket, git! (pokes him with a broom) (Old Man McGucket runs out from underneath the table, panting, and mumbling incoherently.) Ta dum, ta dum... |
Lazy Susan | (locks the door) Good night, diner. Good night, trees. (She passes by the gnomes standing on top of each other, attempting to steal a pie.) Good night, tiny men stealing my pie. Wait, what?! |
Jeff | Lift with your knees. No, your knees. If I go one more hour without eating, I'm gonna resort to cannibalism. (notices Lazy Susan, and tips his hat.) Ma'am. |
Lazy Susan | (shrieks) Little magic men! What does it mean? What do I do? (bumps into a payphone and dials 911) Yes, hi. I's like to report something. I'm at Greasy's Diner. You won't believe what I've witnessed. (Cut to two figures sneaking up behind her, from a patch of nearby bushes) It's unbelievable! It's indescribable! It's- (screams) (The figures sneak up behind her and kidnap her, dragging her away.) |
Blind Ivan | It is unseen. (The Blind Eye symbol is graffited on the wall) |
Jeff | Welp, back to pie. (The gnomes grab the pie and run off. A gnome accidentally drops a slice.) I was this close to eating you, Steve. |
(Cut to theme song.) | |
(Cut to Dipper and Mabel's bedroom. Dipper is examining a poster board on his wall entitled "Who is the Author?) | |
Dipper | Alright author, who are you? Who are you?... (chews on a pen, which accidentally breaks) Blech! Not again. (tosses it into a bin full of pens.) |
Mabel | (runs in) Hey, bro-bro. Look what I got! |
Dipper | (sarcastically) Yay, a filthy green bottle! |
Mabel | It's a bottle message from Mermando, remember? He was part fish, part shirtless guy. (gasps) What if he wants to get back together? |
Dipper | I wouldn't get your hopes up, Mabel. |
Mabel | Too late! Hopes are way way up! (squeals excitedly, opens bottle cap and reads letter) "Dear Mabel..." So far so good! "It is with a heavy heart..." So far so good! "...that I must inform you, I'm getting married"?! |
Dipper | And there it is. |
Mabel | (reading) "In order to prevent an undersea civil war... arranged wedding... Queen of the Manatees?!" (looking at picture) And she's so beautiful! (glumly sighs) This can't be happening! |
Dipper | Oh, Mabel. You'll get over him eventually. |
Mabel | You don't understand, Dipper. (Pulls out her scrapbook.) On my first day here, I made this page for summer romances. Look at my luck. (Points to picture of Norman) Turned out to be gnomes, (Points to picture of Gideon) child psycho, (Points to a picture of Gabe Bensen) made out with his own hands. And now... (writes "FAILED" at the top of the page) I wish I could just forget about them forever. |
Dipper | Hey, if it's any consolation, my summer mission isn't a huge success either. I'm still trying to find the author of this journal, but with this laptop smashed, I've lost any lead in finding him. |
Mabel | (Looks at the laptop) Wait a minute. Dipper, look! |
Dipper | Through your bottle? |
Mabel | Just do it. |
Dipper | (Peers through the bottle, and notices a logo entitled "McGucket Labs" magnified on the back of the laptop) "McGucket Labs." Wait, Old Man McGucket? |
Mabel | You don't think?... |
Dipper | Couldn't be... Doesn't make any sense, unless... (He starts connecting pictures and tying strings to the Author) This matches with this... This goes over here... And then the name... So that would mean... Old Man McGucket wrote the journals?! |
(Cut to Mystery Shack Gift Shop.) | |
Boombox | "Am I blanchin',
Girl we blanchin' I live up on a mansion Am I blanchin', Girl we blanchin' I live up in a mansion" |
Soos | (sings along, while sweeping broom across floor) Am I blanchin', Girl we blanchin', I live up in a mansion |
Wendy | Ugh! I can't get that terrible song out of my head. |
Soos | You mean "Straight Blanchin'" by 'Lil Big Dawg? It's the catchiest song of the summer. |
Wendy | What is "blanchin"? Rappers can't just make up words. |
Soos | Rappers are visionaries, Wendy. If they told me to eat my own pants, I would do it. |
Boombox | "Eat your own pants. Eat your own pants, yeah!" |
Soos | I guess I have no choice. (unzips pants, and hums) Doot, do-do! |
Dipper and Mabel | (run inside) |
Dipper | Wendy, Soos, we need to go see Old Man McGucket! |
Mabel | We'll explain on the way. (everyone runs outside) |
(Cut to Stan Pines, raising his fist) | |
Stan | Hey, what about work? Kids! (pauses) Why is Soos eating his own pants? (walks backwards) |
(Cut to the junkyard. The group look around.) | |
Dipper | Old Man McGucket, are you here? |
Soos | Here hillbilly, billy, billy, billy. |
(Nate and Lee have spraypainted McGucket's shack "Mc Suck It.) | |
Mabel | Here hillbilly, billy, billy, billy. |
Nate | (laughing) That's good. |
Lee | Took an hour to think of this, but it was worth it. Ha! (They run away) |
Old Man McGucket | Get outta here, you salt lickin', hornswagglin... McSuckit. They got me good. (Sees the group.) Visitors! Come, come. (He leads them inside.) Pull up some rusty metal. You're just in time for my hourly turf war with the hillbilly what lives in my mirror. (He yells at his reflection.) Quit starin' at me while I bathe! |
Dipper | You can drop the act, McGucket. I know you're the Author. You studied the mysteries of this town and wrote this book. |
Soos | Dude, you're the genius Dipper's been searching for all summer. |
McGucket | Uh, genius? I'm no genius. I've never done nothin' worthwhile in my life. Everyone knows I'm no good to nobody. I can't remember what I used to be, but I must've been a big failure to end up like this. |
Mabel | But the laptop has your name on it. |
Dipper | What about this book? Are you sure you didn't write it? Here, look closely. (He flips through the journal.) |
McGucket | I told you, I don't recall. Everything before 1982 is just a blur. Just a hazy... (The journal opens to an image of the Blind Eye. He shrieks) The Blind Eye! Robes, the men, my mind! They did something. |
Dipper | Who did? |
McGucket | I... oh, I don't recall. |
Mabel | Oh, you poor old man. No wonder your mind's all (blows raspberry). You've been through something intense. |
Dipper | What if McGucket learned something he wasn't supposed to know, and someone, or something, messed with his mind? We've got to get to the bottom of this. |
Soos | Think, dude. What is the earliest thing you can remember? |
McGucket | Uh, this is, I think. (He pulls down a newspaper article.) |
Wendy | The history museum! |
Dipper | That's where we're going. |
(Cut to the group in a car. "Straight Blanchin" is playing.) | |
Wendy | Ugh, Soos! (She removes the CD and throws it out the window. Pause) I'll buy you a new one. |
At the History Museum. Everyone enters through the windows. | |
Soos | Hello? Anyone here? |
Dipper | All right, keep your eyes peeled for anything suspicious. |
Mabel | (sighs) |
Wendy | Mabel, are you okay? You just walked by a cat without petting it. |
Mabel | Oh Wendy, everything I look at reminds me of failed romances. That formaldehyde heart. That romantic diorama. Even this poster of my most recent ex-crush. (She pulls down a poster of Gabe, revealing a poster of Sev'ral Timez.) Aw, come on! |
Dipper | So your last memory was here. Anything coming back? |
Soos | Guys, look! (Down the hall, a shadowy figure runs away.) |
Dipper | Hey, who's there? (They run into a room filled with depictions of eyes.) |
McGucket | Well kettle my corn. He vanish-ified. |
Dipper | It doesn't make sense. Where did he go? |
McGucket |
I feel like all these eyeballs are a-watchin' me. (The group moves McGucket aside, revealing a central eye. Dipper pushes it, and a staircase forms behind the fireplace.) |
Dipper | A secret passageway. |
McGucket | We'll have to be stealthy. I'll hambone a message if there's trouble. (He slaps his arms and legs. Translation: "Coyotes are coming for our sweetbreads.") |
Dipper | I have no idea what that means. |
(They go down the staircase. Voices chanting. They peek through a curtain to see a circle of hooded figures standing around a box.) | |
Blind Ivan | Who is the subject of our meeting? |
Society member | (Lazy Susan is pulled out, blindfolded.) This woman. |
Dipper | Lazy Susan? |
Blind Ivan | What is it you have seen? |
All members | Speak! |
Lazy Susan | Uh, well, uh, I was leaving the diner, and I saw these little bearded doodads, and I was, like, "Bwaaa?" |
Blind Ivan | There, there. (He pulls ray gun out of the box. The members pull down their hoods.) You won't be like "Bwaaa?" for much longer. |
Lazy Susan | What is that gizmo? It looks like a hair dryer. Are you guys barbers? (The Lead Member zaps her with the gun.) AAAAAH! |
Blind Ivan | Lazy Susan, what do you know of little bearded men? |
Lazy Susan | My mind is cleared, thanks to the Society of the Blind Eye. |
All Society Members | It is unseen! |
Dipper | Oh my gosh. They erased Lazy Susan's memory. Guys, are you seeing this? They just wiped Lazy Susan's memory! |
Soos | They should've wiped off that awful mascara. |
Mabel | I think she looks beautiful. |
Wendy | She's doing the best she can, Soos. |
Soos | Whoa, touched a nerve there. |
Blind Ivan | Lazy Susan, how do you feel? |
Lazy Susan | I feel great! I can't even remember what was wrong, or what I'm doing here, or if I'm a man or a woman! (She is led away) |
Blind Ivan | Your memories will be safe with us, buried in the Hall of the Forgotten. (He removes a tube from the memory erasing gun, and writes "(Lazy) Susan Wentworth" on it.) |
All Society Members | (chanting) Into the Hall of the Forgotten. Into the Hall of the Forgotten. (talking and dispersing) Good chanting, boys. Have you been practicing? |
Blind Ivan | Meeting adjourned. |
Society Members | Unsee you later. Unsee you later! |
Dipper | Amazing. A secret society of evil mind erasers. I'll bet they erased your memory a long time ago. If we could find where your memories have been hidden, it could be the key to unlocking all the mysteries of Gravity Falls. All right, Mabel, Wendy, you two stay here and make sure those robe guys don't come back. |
Wendy | Whoo! Girl's club. |
Dipper | Soos, you, me, and McGucket are gonna go find the Hall of the Forgotten. |
(Soos' hat is blown away) | |
Dipper | Follow that hat! |
Society member | Halt! Is someone there? |
Dipper | Aah! What do we do? Where do we go? |
Soos | (They disguise themselves as a diorama.) |
First Society Member | Man, these are really poorly made. I could've sworn I heard someone. |
Second Society Member | Probably just the janitor kissing that wax settler woman again. |
First Society Member | Whoof! Remind me to erase that from my memory. (They leave) |
Dipper | Whew! (Sees the hat) There it is. Hurry! |
McGucket | Honey fogelin', salt lickin' skullduggery. |
Soos | Man, you have got to teach me some of those old-man swear words. |
Cut to Mabel and Wendy in the main chamber | |
Mabel | (sighs) I just don't get it, Wendy. I hug a lot, I can burp the alphabet, I have scratch and sniff clothing. Why does every boy leave me? |
Wendy | Pfft, who cares? Boys are the worst. You shouldn't get hung up, man. |
Mabel | Maybe I come on too strong, you know? |
Wendy | Well, what's your opener? Pretend I'm a boy. (She puts up her hair, giving herself a mustache.) Mmm, testosterone. (spits) |
Mabel | (loudly) Hi, I'm Mabel! I'm 12 and own a pig! Wanna get married! |
Wendy | (laughs) Honestly, that was perfect. You should just forget about guys, man. |
Mabel | Wendy, that's it. Forget about guys! (She picks up the memory gun) I just need to type "summer romances" into this thing, and I won't feel bad about them anymore. |
Wendy | Whoa, hold up, Mabel. We don't even know what that thing does. You could accidentally erase, like, learning to read, or breathe, or... |
Mabel | Or one of those terrible summer songs you can't get out of your head? |
Cut to the boys in the Hall of the Forgotten. Memory tubes are stacked to the ceiling. | |
Dipper | Whoa, look at all these tubes. |
Soos | People must've been getting their memories erased all over town. |
Dipper | Whoa, look at this. (He inserts a tube titled "Robbie V. Memories" into a viewing machine) |
Lead Society Member | (off screen) Yes, Robbie, what is it that you have seen? |
Robbie | (on screen) So I was attacked by this magic kung fu guy that was throwing, like, balls of fire at me. I kicked his butt though. |
Blind Ivan | (off screen) Robbie, speak honestly. |
Robbie | (on screen) I was saved by a 12-year-old. |
Dipper | Why are they erasing peoples' memories? I still don't get it. |
McGucket | Looky, fellers. (He points to a tube labelled "McGucket Memories") It's those words what people call me. |
Soos | Oh, dude, your memories. We did it! |
McGucket | Grabby, grabby. (He takes the tube, which sets off an alarm.) I got it! |
Wendy | I don't know, Mabel. Are you really sure this is a good idea? |
Mabel | All ideas are good ideas! (Alarm goes off.) |
Wendy | Do you hear that? |
McGucket | The alarm in my brain is a-ringin' again. Ah! |
Society member | Halt! Who's there? |
Dipper | Oh no! |
Soos | Run! |
Society member | Get back here! (He chases Dipper and Soos. McGucket hides.) |
McGucket | Oh, you've really tarred it up now, Fiddleford. This is all your fault. (Pause) Why does my beard have a bandage? Does that even make sense? Why has no one pointed that out? |
Dipper | Okay, I think we're safe. (Hands reach out from the shadows and cover Dipper and Soos's eyes.) |
Soos | We playing "Guess Who"? Dude, I know it's you, Dipper. Such big... strong hands.... (The group is tied to a pole) |
Blind Ivan | You shouldn't have come here. We do not give up our secrets lightly. |
Wendy | Who are you bathrobe-wearing freaks? |
Dipper | Why are you doing this? |
Mabel | What's with your creepy British accent? |
Blind Ivan | Well, I suppose we are going to erase your minds anyway. (One by one, the Society members unmask) |
Mabel | Toby Determined? |
Dipper | Bud Gleeful? |
Wendy | That farmer guy? |
Soos | Creepy dude who married a woodpecker? You too? How's that marriage goin, by the way? |
Woodpecker's husband | Oh, great, great. (whispering) Not great. |
Blind Ivan | And you've never met me before. And if you had, you wouldn't remember. (He removes his hood, revealing a bald tattooed head and one eye) I am Blind Ivan, and we are the Society of the Blind Eye. Formed many years ago by our founder... our founder... Does anyone remember who he was? |
Bud Gleeful | We've been usin' that ray on our own brains an awful lot. |
Dipper | Why would you do all this? What do you have to gain? |
Blind Ivan | As you have no doubt discovered, Gravity Falls is a town plagued with supernatural strangeness. No one knew how to stop the things that went bump in the night, so our founder invented the next best thing: a way for us to forget. We took it upon ourselves to help the troubled townsfolk by erasing the memories of the strange things they've seen. Now the people of Gravity Falls go about their lives ignorant and happy, thanks to us. And as a perk, we help ourselves forget things that trouble us. Everyone has something they'd rather forget. In fact, your own sister was about to use that ray on herself. Isn't that right? |
Dipper | Mabel? Seriously? |
Mabel | Ha ha, maybe... |
Dipper | Don't you see? This is ruining lives! What about Old Man McGucket? He lives in a hut and talks to animals, thanks to you. Don't you feel bad about that? |
Blind Ivan | Mmm, maybe a little. (Shoots himself with the ray) But not anymore. You won't be telling anyone else what you've learned here. Say good-bye to your summer. (He aims the ray gun at them) |
Soos | Guys, if we're gonna forget everything, I got some stuff I wanna get off my chest. Mabel, for half the summer, I thought your name was Maple, like the syrup. No one corrected me! |
Mabel | I only love some of my stuffed animals, and the guilt is killing me! |
Dipper | Sometimes I use big words, and I don't actually know what they mean. I mean, I'm supposed to be the smart guy. If I'm not the smart guy, who am I? |
Wendy | Okay, I'm not actually laid back. I'm stressed, like, 24/7. Have you met my family? |
Blind Ivan | Oh, stop being a bunch of babies. (McGucket jumps down and knocks away the gun.) Owie! |
All | McGucket?! |
McGucket | I raided the mining display for weapons. Now fight like a hillbilly, fellers! |
Everyone grabs a weapon: axes, stuffed raccoons. Soos grabs an informational display about dysentery. | |
Soos | Oh, nobody better mess! |
Blind Ivan | They know too much. Don't let them escape! |
Wendy | (attacking a society member) Get this song outta your head! |
Soos | Dysentery' gonna get you, dawg! |
Dipper | I gotta get the memory tube. |
Blind Ivan | Oh no you don't! |
Dipper | (puts the memory tube into a transport tube. It zooms around the room.) Mabel, catch! |
Sprott | I'll take that, thank you. Give it up, boy. You're no match for the unstoppable power of- (His rob is caught in the tube and rips off, leaving Sprott in his underwear.) That's right, I don't wear nothin' under my robe. Not gonna apologize for that. Maybe y'all should apologize for bein' a bunch of prudes. |
All | Eew! |
Soos | Well, time to erase that forever. (He holds up the gun, but Blind Ivan snatches it.) |
Blind Ivan | Give me that tube. |
Dipper | Never! That memory belongs to McGucket. |
Blind Ivan | The Society's secrets belong to us. (He has the group in a corner and points the ray at them.) End of the line. By tomorrow, this will all seem like a bad dream. Say goodbye to your precious memories. (He fires the gun) |
Dipper | No!! (He shields his eyes, but finds McGucket has jumped in front of the group, catching the ray.) McGucket, you took a bullet for me. (McGucket gets shot with the ray again.) Oh my gosh! Are you okay! |
McGucket | As okay as I'll ever be! (laughs) |
Blind Ivan | What? (He keeps shooting at McGucket, who slowly walks toward him.) Why... isn't... this... working? |
McGucket | Hit me with your best shot, Baldy! My mind's been gone for thirty-odd years! YOU CAN'T BREAK WHAT'S ALREADY BROKEN! |
McGucket |
Say goodnight, Sally! (He headbutts Blind Ivan. The Society members are tied up) |
Blind Ivan | Unhand us! |
Soos | It isn't so fun being tied up, is it? |
Mabel | Hey, wanna draw on their faces? |
Blind Ivan | What? |
Mabel | Tra-la-la... (She crosses out Ivan's "knowledge" tattoo and replaces it with "butts".) |
Blind Ivan | Hey, stop that! That's not funny. |
Mabel | It's pretty funny. |
Soos | It's, like, objectively funny. |
Blind Ivan | We'll have our revenge. We'll never forget what you've done. |
Dipper | Oh, I think you just might. (He holds up the ray gun.) Say cheese. |
Cut to the outside of the Museum. The Society members, in normal clothes, are walking out.) | |
Dipper | Thanks for visiting the Museum for Gold Miner Appreciation Night. Be sure to tip the gold miner on your way out. |
Blind Ivan | I'm sorry, but what's my name? Where am I? |
Dipper | Oh, might have overdone that one. |
Mabel | Your name is Toot-toot McBumbersnazzle. You're a traveling banjo minstrel, with a song in your heart, and funny tattoos on your head. |
Blind Ivan | Yes, I am Toot-toot McBumbersnazzle. Cheers! (walks away, singing) "Toot-toot is my name..." |
Dipper | All right, McGucket, are you ready to see your memories? Find out who you really are? |
McGucket | I'm not so sure. What if I don't like what I see? |
Mabel | We've come all this way. Go on. |
McGucket puts the tube into the machine. An image pops up on the screen of McGucket, 30 years younger.) | |
Younger McGucket | My name is Fiddleford Hadron McGucket, and I wish to unsee what I have seen. |
All | gasp |
McGucket | Sweet sarsaparilla. |
Younger McGucket | For the past year, I have been working as an assistant for a visiting researcher. He has been cataloging his findings about Gravity Falls in a series of journals. I helped him build a machine which he believed had the potential to benefit all mankind, but something went wrong. I decided to quit the project. But I lie awake at night, haunted by the thoughts of what I've done. I believe I have invented a machine that can permanently erase these memories from my mind. (He holds up the memory erasing ray.) Test subject One: Fiddleford. (He shoots it. The screen goes to static.) |
Younger McGucket | It worked! I can't recall a thing. (Static) I call it the Society of the Blind Eye. We will help those who want to forget by erasing their bad memories! (Static, Younger McGucket is more disheveled and nervous.) Today, I came across a colony of little men, very disturbing. I would like to forget seeing this. (Static. McGucket's lab is a mess and his arm is in a cast.) I accidentally hit another car in town today. I feel terri-bibble! Terrible. I've been forgetting words lately. I wonder if there are any negative side effects... (static. McGucket has a beard and is filming from a motel.) I saw something in the lake, something big! (static) My hair's been a-fallin' out, so I got this hat from a scarecrow. Hey, are my pants on backwards? (static. McGucket is wild-eyed and filming from the junkyard. Maniacal giggling and speaking gibberish. The tape ends.) |
Mabel | Oh, McGucket, I'm so sorry. |
McGucket | Aw, hush. You kids helped me get my memories back, just like you said. |
Mabel | But did you want those memories back? |
McGucket | After all these years, I finally know who I am. Maybe I messed up in the past, but now that I seen what happened, I can begin to put myself together again. (He hambones "Thanks for opening my eyes".) |
Dipper | Still don't know what that means. So, wait. You weren't the Author, but you worked with him. Do you remember who he was? |
McGucket | It's beginning to come back, but I need more time. And reading glasses. Heck! (spits) I got some rememberin' to do. |
Wendy | So Mabel, you still wanna erase those failed summer romances? |
Mabel | You know, no one likes having bad memories, but maybe it's better to remember the bad things and learn from them than to go all denial crazy trying to forget. |
Wendy | That's some mature junk right there, Mabel. |
Mabel | Yep. Miss Mature. That's me. Hey, you wanna help me vandalize this picture of my jerky ex-crush? (They all doodle on a picture of Gabe.) |
Wendy | (They get into the car.) Hey, you know what? Going on this big adventure actually made me get that stupid song out of my head. |
Soos | Nice. (He starts the car. "Straight Blanchin" plays.) |
Wendy | Oh, come on! |
Credits | |
McGucket | (sitting in the back of the car with Dipper. Flipping through the journal.) It's all so familiar. It's almost like I can remember... |
Cut to Stan working on the universe portal | |
Stan | (Pouring fuel) All right, you're getting closer. Every day it's getting stronger. (A gust of wind grabs his notebook and mug and sucks them into the portal.) Haha, yes! (A flying pipe hits his hand.) Ah! (Bandaging the wound) I don't care if it's dangerous. I don't care how long it takes. I'm gonna pull this off, and no one's gonna get in my way! (Focus on a picture of Dipper and Mabel) |